Post Feb 20,
February is a
sad month for me. Like Carl Sandburg’s
“fog”, sadness creeps up on “little cat feet”, though I recognize the feeling
each year I wonder why, then remember.
My Beloved Erv died (it’s time to capitalize Beloved) on the 27th of
February six years ago, my brother had died the year before on the 28th
of February; yesterday I was informed that my friend, Erv’s sister died this
week, at age 92 in Baltimore. I will
manage to get through this month, but next year I will find something special
to keep me busy, at the end of January and maybe take the sharp sad edge off of
February.
My brother and
my Beloved aged with grace. They did not worry just focused on each day as it
came. There is a lot of talk today about our escalating aging population,
almost every social service agency, synagogue and church are seeking ways to
make the process less threatening, more secure and even fun. The perks that come with age go beyond a
cheaper movie ticket, there are even perks to being alone…believe it or
not! Some folks who need help in
finding those perks, choose the couch and “woe is me” instead. The perks
encompass many concepts. From being
responsible for self to eating/sleeping/napping/nibbling on our own schedule we
are face-to-face with a new kind of freedom that frequently balances the pain
of loss.
In my
area of Southern California Jewish Family Service (JFS) has just launched a
program known as “Home Not Alone”. The
program will train volunteers to enable elderly folks to stay at home. That means giving supportive help in most
aspects of daily living: light housework, shopping, meal preparation, laundry
and paper work. At 92 I can attest to
the fact that each category has problems I confront almost daily. From time to time my bed only gets changed
every other week because I need help in exchanging my well-slept-in queen size
sheets and blankets for clean ones.
Just washing them in my smart washing machine takes my breath away. This JFS program to reach out to the elderly
is a double whammy. It is also an
opportunity for retired healthy “aging” folks to volunteer, to make a
contribution, meet new people and engage the community.
Palomar Medical
Center in Escondido, has a SOCS Box program sponsored by its San Marcos Community
Action Council. Volunteers are trained to Save Our Seniors. A training is held to give volunteers
knowledge of the community resources that are specifically oriented to seniors.
They are trained in listening and observing so they are able to make referrals. They are not counselors, but
observer-visitors. They are trained to
understand the signs of depression or illness, recognize suicidal thoughts that
can mean the volunteers are possibly
the first ones to detect a problem.
That is why knowledge of the resources is called a tool box. It extends more than a helping hand..
It is
interesting to note that many “Meals-on-Wheels” volunteers take this
training. They see some folks every day
and are often the only people from the outside to come in, even for a quick
visit. Their powers of observation can
be vital to the health and survival of an aging individual.
My Mom and my
mother-in-law died at the age of 67, my sister-in-law and I reached 92 (I am
still here). This is a different age
and I am delighted that there are professionals out there looking out for our
welfare and volunteers eager to help.
